Reasonable Errors : The transformation

So thats about till upper primary (7th grade).

There was a total change, once into high school. Apart from the usual new term promotions ( new friends, new thing to learn etc..), there were so many tings happening within you and outside. Both LIC and LF were changing, with a new broader outlook and perspectives. Eventhough LIC was majorly dominating the period, someting was brewing inside which came into light in a slow and undiscoverable fashion.

LIC was slowly getting tired and beginning to listen to LF's strategies and plans. The transformation was so stealthy, when LF started acting upon, I could not realise whether its Me (LostFeather) or the other ME(LostInConsciousness).

Experimenting was the key word. Anything which is banned from taking upon or following or accessing, were considered to be the most wanted and sought after. This continued through pre graduate and graduate level.
Wow.. that was fast.. for I remeber very less of those days.

And one more funny thing is happening at the other end. LIS has decided to break shackles and start scripting in the blog. So long... lets hear what he jas to say... (Warning!!! ... continuity may break as we switch from LF to LIC as there is no guarantee for ME to comeback to LF.. in a way good... but not as exciting..) ..

OK guys.. See u on the other side...

Reasonable Errors - The Nerd (???)

So its been long huh....? LIC was acting up :-)

Anyway let go back to the era of the NERD :-). More or less that was an uneventful period, or LF thought so. More like a bookworm - i hate that word - or better a nobody. People used to think that I was a winner, may be or may be not. Each time I accomplished something, deep within LFwas plotting something devilish...

Resonable Errors - The Beginning

'Stranger... that's the inherent state of everyone', those were the words which hit me. In a way that seem to be funny... but i thought otherwise. It always prompted me to look back, and always gave me the courage for reasoning... Mere thinking of it unfolds a world of explanation in front of me, as i mentioned earlier, to the loser within...

I'm turning back 24 years... back to my 1st std.

There were very few students who were not making any noise or crying (very uncommon compared to a 1st grader on the first day at school). I's like totally amazed by the new atmosphere. The amazement gave way to a kind of solitary mood , the following months. No friends, as such, and I cared little even about my bench mates. I still remember, used to keep asking the teacher what time it is, even though did not know the significance... That was just to avoid being slipped into that peculiar state of mind, which is still haunting me. That state which prompts me out of the alter ego... yes!!! i love to be the other me.

For all i can remember, the other me first took full control when i was in 2nd std. All i can remember is a rainy day ... heavy drops popping on to the roof tiles, and nobody was in a mood to teach or learn. After 10 minutes, i knew that i was standing at the window watching the pour down from the sky. Then I started walking along the side hallway, which separated two divisions. I still remember the teachers were whispering something to each other and laughing in husky voices, at me. I seemed to be in a contend mood, not giving attention to even my classmates who were staring with bewildered eyes. This went on for the entire 45 minutes (one period) it seems. At last i took my seat and suddenly I's all ears to the social studies lessons. I thought about this for a long time, at least till my 7th std, where i left that school and joined junior high.

During that time, those 7 years, I would like to believe myself to be in the other me mode. Yeah, as i said, the other me is not the real me, at least for myself (Don't worry, confusing others in my own way seems to be my default nature). The other me, is interesting , though, as I turned out to be a shy and studious and obedient scholar kind of guy (yeah, the NERD, in the terms of the real me)...

More about that in the next episode. See you all , Later!!!

PS: For simplicity, lets call the real me as LF (after lost feather, my identity idol) and the other me as LIC (after lost in consciousness, the other Me's facebook ).....

The loser within...

Never wanted to admit it.. but its the ultimate truth, isn't it? Showed up back in the startup years, very vague to be ignored. Woke up again when life was about to blossom for a good reason. Enough promises to self but, it rises like a mighty nightmare. Now it has reached its prime, boosted by obviuos reasons, lame excuses... god.... where is it taking me..
I need the primal medicine, for of course its confidence in self... which I need the most...

Pain

One question remains.. Why?
Classical but still the most haunted one. Sometimes HE playes the most saddistic games. Most of the times we lose faith.
Still have to go on and on till the time someone else asks WHY?
Heart, felt like a grounded paste, thoughts blurred as ever, din't know whome to console or what to do..
Nevermind, ability to forget, a real boon, sometimes..

Black coffee

Bottles on the cloud... surely you were on a high.
Roads patched with red... no doubt, its sortta sweet.
Flies are due in any moment... no bloody puke on my carpet.
Hey hey hey what you mixed in my black coffee... for am in the 1st grade with a tofee.

Not your average filer

Nothing could convince me then... Those where the days when you felt like a hot air balloon. Not a single day passed without me checking on the daily digest in the tech review. Most articles where either dramatically puffed up with jargons or practical stupidity.
It's pouring out in gallons there, when i finally caught hold of the page i's waiting for. The cute face reminded me of some country fisher boy. The skin was deep tanned and his eyes darted out thick ink.
My desk was filled with blotted papers, otherwise known as contemporary pros, in no time. "Just in time, friend", said the publisher.
When the ethyl drops squeezed through the sensory system, that night, I shouted at the mirror, "One for the classiest intellectual thief,ever"...